Archive for October, 2016

When Did Civility, Tolerance and Respect Become Bad?

October 19, 2016

This morning a Facebook post from a good friend caught my attention. It was a series of pictures of her oldest, who runs cross-country track events and recently won a race. What I appreciated was the message that went along with the pictures: “This kid keeps winning his cross-country races but what makes me prouder is that he waits and congratulates each person across the finish line.”

In a country obsessed with winning and being the best this image stands out to me. In a country embroiled in a very ugly and contentious presidential race, this practice of congratulating others for making it across the finish line stands out to me. In a time when it is acceptable and even applauded to call our opponents names like “loser” and “deplorables” this stands out to me.

Perhaps other elections have been this ugly and stooped so low. I don’t remember any in my lifetime in which the rancor has been so public (however, I know from history that there have been plenty of ugly races.) But the glee with which the civility of our public discourse has been eroded is disturbing, and we should all be embarrassed by the tenor and tone of debate that has occurred.

I won’t rehash what has been said. That isn’t my purpose here. But I am concerned for what happens after the election is over. Will we all be able to move on with our lives? Will we ever be able to recover from the lines that have been crossed and the particular brand hostility and viciousness that have polluted this election cycle?

Some of us are hurt and angry, afraid that we are being left behind. Some of us are hurt and angry that the American Dream that they have been promised seems to have disappeared. Fear and anger go hand in hand, and if not addressed can be deadly.

In his daily devotions last week, Father Richard Rohr calls us to picture ourselves before the crucified Jesus, and recognize that he became all of the things that we fear: nakedness, exposure, vulnerability and failure.  All of that anger we feel because we are afraid is exposed in Jesus on the cross. All of the disappointment we feel because we feel left behind is exposed in Jesus on the cross.  Like a great wound, when anger, disappointment and fear are exposed they can be dealt with and allowed to heal. We find that we no longer need to lash out in anger and we no longer need to fear the other, the future, our finitude because it no longer controls us.

To return to my thoughts about this election season and the damage it is doing to us individually and as a nation, a line in a Washington Post article caught my attention today as well: There are certain qualities of heart and mind that allow for self-government — civility, tolerance and mutual respect. I am afraid that we are losing these qualities because instead of being encouraged to heal ourselves of our anger and fear we are being encouraged to wallow in it and to lash out– which may satisfy for awhile but in the long term will only do more damage to ourselves and our country as a whole.

I am not saying that we shouldn’t speak out against injustice. Injustice must never be tolerated. But if we lose our ability to speak the truth in love, with respect, with tolerance and with civility we risk losing the very basis of our society. And that, my friends, would be a terrible blow not only for us but for the whole world.